After a few not entirely relaxed evenings, including one where my husband and I had an argument during the little dude’s bath (me: don’t rev him up when he’s overtired! husband: don’t snap at me the second I walk into the house! me: I KEPT MY PATIENCE WITH TWO KIDS ALONE FOR ELEVEN HOURS I AM A FRAZZLED WRECK AT THIS POINT OF COURSE I’M SNAPPY, etc), we’re trying to work on two things:
- Being alert to each other’s moods and trying to both take responsibility for preempting conflict and deescalating when tense moments arise.
- Identifying the crunch points and creating rituals/routines to help us through them.
Since the little dude has dropped his nap, evenings are a particular crunch point.
The system we’re working on is to read stories on the couch between dinner finishing and Mr Daddy getting home, which is anywhere between half an hour and five minutes, then we put both kids in the bath as soon as he gets home. Evenings are already much smoother.